Cyprus-Forum.com

[Natty]

Wow, I didn't realize just how long my last post was!

Well either I've been writing the most fabulous life changing advice ever, or I've been writing bull for the past Half an hour.....I guess it's up to you guys to judge (although I suspect it's the latter, I've never really been that great at giving advice....unfortunately... )

[Sotos]

I guess the conventional way to approach a lady, is by walking up to her, politely introducing yourself, and perhaps offering to buy her a drink, or you could do it the other way around, you could instead offer to buy her a drink first and then if she says yes, introduce yourself.

What if you offer her a drink, she accepts, but then she doesn't want to talk to you? Do you take your offer back?

[MarsdenCuckoo]

I guess the conventional way to approach a lady, is by walking up to her, politely introducing yourself, and perhaps offering to buy her a drink, or you could do it the other way around, you could instead offer to buy her a drink first and then if she says yes, introduce yourself.

What if you offer her a drink, she accepts, but then she doesn't want to talk to you? Do you take your offer back?

In that case you know it's not the sort of 'lady' you'd want to talk to anyway!!

[ecpersonals]

Don't ever buy or offer a girl you don't know a drink, EVER! Problem solved
Once a guy bought two beers for a girl i was eyeing. She took them and came over and offered them to me..

I like chatting to women at bars who get approached a lot by guys to discuss where the guys are going wrong. Last night this woman told me that "that guy over there" stood next to her and said " Hello baby what's your name" But generaly it is " Hello, where you from?" Also a NO-NO.

Personaly i have learned not to ask anything in the first 1-3 minutes. Instead you should make statements that would get her to talk and let her mention things about herself at her own pase.

[cankertoo]

Hello to all the people who have been helping me all the time. A big HELLO to Kikapu, you are a great man.

I have returned with some news, now I know why they say no news is good news.

There is this girl who I have been watching everyday. I just see her come and go and sometimes I just keep looking at her (now I think this is the maintain eye contact part). I know for sure that she knows Iam watching her all the time. Most of the times she turns away when I come around. I still dont give up and somehow she started to atleast look at me.

Then I tried to talk to her, I asked her if she would come have lunch with me. I asked her politely and she refused even more politely.

Where do I procceed from here? I will still be seeing her everday. What do I do?

[Sotos]

I think it was a mistake to ask her out from the first time you talked to her. Instead of keep looking for her for days you should have found an excuse to talk to her earlier for something unimportant like the weather or something better depending on the occasion. Then since you see her every day you could say hello to her every day and maybe exchange a word or two. Then after a while you could have asked in an indirect way to find out if she is available. Then instead of lunch offering her a coffee at a cafe would probably be a better idea. Conclusion: Take it easy and don't rush!

[Kikapu]

I think it was a mistake to ask her out from the first time you talked to her. Instead of keep looking for her for days you should have found an excuse to talk to her earlier for something unimportant like the weather or something better depending on the occasion. Then since you see her every day you could say hello to her every day and maybe exchange a word or two. Then after a while you could have asked in an indirect way to find out if she is available. Then instead of lunch offering her a coffee at a cafe would probably be a better idea. Conclusion: Take it easy and don't rush!

I agree with everything what Sotos said. You got to be careful, that an "eye contact" is mutual, so that she knows that you exist, but she does does not feel like she is being stalked by "Jack the Ripper". It would have been useful to know if she is in a relationship or not before inviting her to lunch. Since she said no, for now, it is best to give her "space". She may like you still, but she needs time to think about it. She may also be shy. You can have small talk with her when it's possible, but do not stare at her. If you catch her looking at you, just smile back and either wave or just say hello. In time, if she is interested, since she knows that you're interested in her, she will let you know. If you continue being in each others "SPACE", and talking to each other has taken off into a level higher, and you know more about her, then invite her for a coffee.

Be cool and do not rush. Most relationships starts with the Girl saying "NO" first, so don't be discouraged.

[Sotos]

I agree with everything what Kikapu said. cankertoo, keep as informed of your progress. And don't worry too much. It is like learning to ride a bicycle. You have to learn from your mistakes but once you learn you will be able to do it effortlessly

[Natty]

Personaly i have learned not to ask anything in the first 1-3 minutes. Instead you should make statements that would get her to talk and let her mention things about herself at her own pase.

Actually, you've got a point there.....So I guess it was bull...

[ecpersonals]

Well i went out last night and had a blast. I was a with a friend who just wanted to sit, but he would point me to girls and i would go talk to them. It was hilarious. I broke some of my own rules and started with a question about them (but they were spontaneous so it went ok)

Then i would go back to my friend and he would ask, how old are they? where are they from? I told him i didn't ask yet and am not going to! Those are taxi driver questions!!

Incredibly all the girls were responsive. Appoarch with a smile and talk to everyone in the group.