Cyprus-Forum.com

[unique_earthling]

lol Miltiades, so true, i wonder what it would be like to have several husbands at once, all at my command for my every whim... ok ok enough of that!!.....

[GG]

And anyway, I always walk 10 steps behind my date. Its the only way to look at other women without being caught.

[unique_earthling]

I think if most women really knew what went on inside most mens heads they would never marry them......

[sal]

And anyway, I always walk 10 steps behind my date. Its the only way to look at other women without being caught.

genius!!!!!!!!!

[reportfromcyprus]

The mistakes come when men value loyalty over love, and mistake obligation for marriage.

That's why there's a change in behaviour after they get married. Initially, they're busy impressing their girlfriend with their 'good behaviour' which then turns into a tedious obligation and unthinking loyalty (which doesn't mean they don't cheat on their wives).

Then they wake up in their forties wondering why nothing means anything to them and they don't know the stranger they married.

Anyone seen American Beauty? That's the syndrome I'm talking about. Social obligation taken to extremes reduces people's capacity to become individuals and develop their own personalities.

That goes for the players too, they're just as much sheep as the dutifully married ones - if they are married just for the sake of it.

[GG]

The mistakes come when men value loyalty over love, and mistake obligation for marriage.

That's why there's a change in behaviour after they get married. Initially, they're busy impressing their girlfriend with their 'good behaviour' which then turns into a tedious obligation and unthinking loyalty (which doesn't mean they don't cheat on their wives).

Then they wake up in their forties wondering why nothing means anything to them and they don't know the stranger they married.

That goes for the players too, they're just as much sheep as the dutifully married ones - if they are married just for the sake of it.

So whats the solution?

Help me.

[reportfromcyprus]

There's no solution per se, it's a process, I think. A necessary one. It's not like we can become enlightened about ourselves by being perfect or behaving well. Mistakes are there to be learned from.

My best advice is be real and connect with yourself and the woman you're with in an honest way. And don't burn yourself out

[GG]

Lots of Greek men I know that are married are actually happier and nicer towards their wives when they have a secret woman on the side. Without the secret woman these men treat their wives worse and there is generally a more hostile atmosphere in their family homes. I know its unthinkable for you women to accept that as a solution but it works whether you like it or not.

[reportfromcyprus]

They're not so secret

It's not unthinkable, there are marriage where that is the accepted norm. If the wife accepts this, it's up to her.

I'm not sure if the secret woman is a solution or a good substitute for real love and heartfelt monogamy. There are marriages in the arab world, for instance, which are monogamous, even though their religion permits them more wives.

But then again, everyone has their own way of doing things. If an open marriage works, why not? But both parties should be happy with this arrangement.

The 'secret' woman is really just a gesture of defiance, and a 'spare' to reassure the man that he's still attractive.

[miltiades]

GG YOUR SEX MAD , IF I WERE YOU I WOULD TAKE THE MATTER TO HAND IMMEDIATELY !