Cyprus-Forum.com

[pumpernickle]

Ok you cultureless cretins, listen to what the mighty pump has to say here, for yet another one of my quality yet utterly pointless threads.

You've heard of (for those who do not live in a cave, so I'm addressing about 47% of you) NWA, and their seminal rap hit of 1988 - Straight Outta Compton?

If the memory is hazy, I suggest downloading it or dusting off the CD in your collection and giving it a whirl. It's a mighty fine tune and shall remain so in black music history. Maybe I should stop there, as most cypriots i have met are as racist as hell, but I wont. So keep reading.

I've decided to release a remix. It will be on sale from the moment I walk into the office of the closest record label with an ouzi and a half bottle of Jaggermesiter for dutch courage. Discount for Cyprus Forumers of 5%. Expect to see me on top of the pops, and that sh1t show on rik super bingo on a monday night. Yes ladies and gents, The Pumpernickle is the next big thang. So here's a sneak preview of the lyrics.
(p.s. you'll know it's me on TV, I'll be wearing the pink and yellow spandex, smoking a lambert and butler fag through an 18 inch cigarette colder, and dancing around with an ozzie osbourne wig and a radioactive fake tan. The DJ will be wearing the fake head of a mongoose, and there'll be some dance extra blowing bubbles through a giant plastic hoop made of the hitherto liquified remains of my ex bosses country mansion.

here it is:

.......

When something happens in downtown Larnaca, nothing happens, it's just another Siesta, Siesta, Siesta, reason not to work......

Straight outta Larnaca
A crazy mo-fo named Pumpernickle
Coming at you dirty russian ex pats with a hammer and a sickle

When I'm ripped off, I buy a sawn off.
And when I realise it's made of plastic and fires water, I cry and smoke a Davidoff.

You'll see me on the finegoudes
struggling to blow up a lilo next to a pasty english fat man, called Les
before I'm swimming, I eat a sandwich with extra filling...and when I go back to the hire car the attendant is giving me a grilling

yo, I'm straight outta Larnaca...

[woo woo woo woo]

Straight outta Larnaca, where the shops never open
Walk to close to the curb, and you'll find yourself soaken,
with the contents of a stinking bucket...from the granny above who's dumped it.."oh f**k it"....you will yell as you head back to change.
To find your neighbour in your pjamas, cos she be deranged.

"hope ya don't mind" she says ta yo ass in Greek
"But I felt a tap tap an noticed there's a leak
comin' from yo punk assed flat, so I let me in
oh, and now I know the number of your credit card pin

I'm coming straight outta Larnaca...

[sound of police car sirens breaking down because the cruudy old megane hasnt been served in 3 years...]

I'm Easy-P and I'm coming...

Straight outta Larnaca, I'm locally known as a hero
Especially when I shop for Nero
the yayas all love me, cause I carry their shopping for them...and make tea,
And when I'm done...I go plant a TREE
cos that's what's needed in this giant parking lot,
with concrete blocks and cabarets and men with snot
all over their face cos their mamas aint there to wipe it off

yeah.

[Hazza]

I think you have yourself a hit there Pumpernickle!

[andri_cy]

lol nice.

[andri_cy]

Ok you cultureless cretins, listen to what the mighty pump has to say here, for yet another one of my quality yet utterly pointless threads.

You've heard of (for those who do not live in a cave, so I'm addressing about 47% of you) NWA, and their seminal rap hit of 1988 - Straight Outta Compton?

If the memory is hazy, I suggest downloading it or dusting off the CD in your collection and giving it a whirl. It's a mighty fine tune and shall remain so in black music history. Maybe I should stop there, as most cypriots i have met are as racist as hell, but I wont. So keep reading.

I've decided to release a remix. It will be on sale from the moment I walk into the office of the closest record label with an ouzi and a half bottle of Jaggermesiter for dutch courage. Discount for Cyprus Forumers of 5%. Expect to see me on top of the pops, and that sh1t show on rik super bingo on a monday night. Yes ladies and gents, The Pumpernickle is the next big thang. So here's a sneak preview of the lyrics.
(p.s. you'll know it's me on TV, I'll be wearing the pink and yellow spandex, smoking a lambert and butler fag through an 18 inch cigarette colder, and dancing around with an ozzie osbourne wig and a radioactive fake tan. The DJ will be wearing the fake head of a mongoose, and there'll be some dance extra blowing bubbles through a giant plastic hoop made of the hitherto liquified remains of my ex bosses country mansion.

here it is:

.......

When something happens in downtown Larnaca, nothing happens, it's just another Siesta, Siesta, Siesta, reason not to work......

Straight outta Larnaca
A crazy mo-fo named Pumpernickle
Coming at you dirty russian ex pats with a hammer and a sickle

When I'm ripped off, I buy a sawn off.
And when I realise it's made of plastic and fires water, I cry and smoke a Davidoff.

You'll see me on the finegoudes
struggling to blow up a lilo next to a pasty english fat man, called Les
before I'm swimming, I eat a sandwich with extra filling...and when I go back to the hire car the attendant is giving me a grilling

yo, I'm straight outta Larnaca...

[woo woo woo woo]

Straight outta Larnaca, where the shops never open
Walk to close to the curb, and you'll find yourself soaken,
with the contents of a stinking bucket...from the granny above who's dumped it.."oh f**k it"....you will yell as you head back to change.
To find your neighbour in your pjamas, cos she be deranged.

"hope ya don't mind" she says ta yo ass in Greek
"But I felt a tap tap an noticed there's a leak
comin' from yo punk assed flat, so I let me in
oh, and now I know the number of your credit card pin

I'm coming straight outta Larnaca...

[sound of police car sirens breaking down because the cruudy old megane hasnt been served in 3 years...]

I'm Easy-P and I'm coming...

Straight outta Larnaca, I'm locally known as a hero
Especially when I shop for Nero
the yayas all love me, cause I carry their shopping for them...and make tea,
And when I'm done...I go plant a TREE
cos that's what's needed in this giant parking lot,
with concrete blocks and cabarets and men with snot
all over their face cos their mamas aint there to wipe it off

yeah.

you should record it. My hubby is big NWA fan. I want him to get to know Cyprus since he wants to move there so bad...

[Main_Source]

Wasnt crazy about NWA...the only decent rapper they had was Ice Cube and he left after the first or second album. After that, they started to make meaningless gangster rap records which really fucked up hip hop.

My own theory is anything that comes from Dr Dre is bad for rap..

Dr Dre --> Eminem --> 50 Cent --> G Unit... for example.

Watch out for my Cyprus version of Public Enemy's 'Fight The Power'. lol

[pumpernickle]

agreed, Ice Cube the far superior rap artist.

West Coast rap has generally been quite retrograde IMO. A bit stuck in the past, hasnt evolved that well. Took eminem from Michigan to come along and inject some style and substance.

still, that 1992 era of rap was good for its day.

[Main_Source]

1992 era... 'They Reminisnce Over You' by Pete Rock and CL Smooth. REAL HIP HOP!

[kerez]

1992 era... 'They Reminisnce Over You' by Pete Rock and CL Smooth. REAL HIP HOP!

Noooo....don't tell me you think you are a DJ.......HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....and you know all about music aswell do you.......muppet.

[pumpernickle]

post the link and I'll download the tune if poss.

i lost interest in rap after about 1997/1998. All the same now, except they get punk ass fake biatches to go record with them, like Justin Timberlake. What a waste of time.

Can't beat a spot of good old fashioned British indie music for nostalgia and sing along value.

[bonnie]

lol