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[Leonidas]

A Scottish Jew who had worked hard all his life in
Scotland, decided that he would like to enjoy life a little, so he went
to the exclusive St. Andrews Club. He was told on applying that his
application would have to be approved by the Membership Board and that
he would have their decision in a couple of days.


Two days later he was told that his application was
refused. He went there to find out why.

He was asked, "You're Jewish,
aren't you?" "Aye" he answered, "but I'm as Scottish as you are Jock."



"Well, you understand that we wear nothing under our kilts."



"Aye, I know that."



"And being Jewish, you must be circumcised."



"Aye I am that" Well, the board decided that they could not stand a

circumcised man parading around with us."



"Och, away with ye man," he cried. "I know I must be a Protestant to

march in the Orangeman's parade, and a Catholic to belong to the

Knights of Columbus, but this is the first time I've heard that a
man had to be a complete prick to be a Scotsman