Forgive me for writing again... I'm sure every crack-pot who has ever read your books wants to communicate with you... I hope that you find my plight at least of interest...
What did it mean to be a Salos for Fidel... long ago I reasoned that since we are all connected, everything that happens in this world is our fault... we are responsible... thus if we can harmonise and transcend all the difficulties we see in the world within ourselves then we can effect real change... however I was at that time still working as a materialist... I believed in memes... not elementals... there is a subtle difference... that was until I visited Cuba and met with a Santeria (a syncretisation between Catholicism and a type of Voodoo - African religion) Priest... shortly afterwards I became schizophrenic... I started having visions, or delusions, call them what you like... I felt like I was being pushed towards Islam... and I began to associate some of my thoughts with spirits or Orishas (which are the intermediaries between God and humans in Santeria)... yet still I reasoned all this away as memes... thought forms that had existence in the flux of language and ideas... I quickly identified the source of my push towards Islam... Sheikh Nazim, who had a house and mosque directly adjacent the mental hospital I was taken to... I began to watch him and observed him to be a master of memes... I became more interested in spiritual masters and wondered whether there were any in the Greek Cypriot community... it was then that I found your books... all along the biggest issue that I had tried to harmonise within myself was that of "race"... I had grown up immersed in "Black Power" literature and music and following my father's lead I identified myself as a "non-White"... however when it came to sex and race I was stumped... slowly after reading your books I began to realise that the only way to transcend "race" is to transcend materialism altogether... this is what Sheikh Nazim had been speaking about all along... the question that I am left with is at what speed does one transcend materialism... the words that are pronounced through Nazim, for he always denies that the source of his words is himself, are that we transcend materialism immediately... this world is, accordingly coming to an end, Armageddon is upon us... further this world is completely useless and we should only be concerned with the hereafter... I have experienced many times delusions that the Apocalypse was upon me... I have come to view such things as a purging or stripping of the ego from worldly attachments... it is a mystical process that one goes through... but still I have never yet fully accepted the outcome... the end of the world... as Nazim does... my question remains... at what speed does one transcend materialism?... and does one come back?... when I have come back into the world of "race" I have realised that some attachment to ones procreation is valuable in creating the world... thus some degree of attachment to some concept of "race" is justified... be it culture... physicality... whatever... however truly this is a sin as it takes us away from union with God and into the creation of ones own ego... Nazim says something else that is interesting... he asks does ones ego ride one like a donkey or do you ride your ego like a horse?... this is another way of my saying the same thing... what about creation?... God creates through us... and that requires an ego as the first stage of creation... is not creation equally as important as transcendence?... the most balanced approach I have to this is the taoist classic the Yi Jing which I use regularly... Daskalos also seems extremely balanced on this point... I understand your disillusionment with him, probably when for some reason he chose to ride his ego in a certain direction, or maybe even his ego rode him, I do not know, but I understand this disillusionment lead you to monasticism as the ultimate aim... in many respects Sheikh Nazim is even more extreme as a Saint with his emphasis on the Last Days and Armageddon... in truth with so much "racial" disharmony in the world, such extremes are justified... but still a little bit of me wants to live... I don't know what I am asking you... if anything... just to connect with someone close to me ethnically and intellectually... my family remain staunch materialists... and I am still concerned that I might relapse at any moment into another bout of Armageddon
Many thanks for your time...
I've just read his signature... 
