by devil » Wed Sep 26, 2007 12:17 pm
They say never trust a Greek bearing gifts. I say, never trust a Cypriot giving directions.
Firstly, they have NO idea of distances. For example, on Exit 10 to Mosfiloti, there is a sign proclaiming a (good) fish&chippery right 300 m. In fact, if you went 9 times that distance, you still wouldn't have reached it. Another example: go from Orphanides (Strovolos) towards Latsia past the stadium. At the 3rd junction after the stadium, there is a sign, "Petrol, 300 m ->". In reality, much nearer this time, it's only 1 km distant. But 300 m is the Cypriot standard for any distance between 100 m and 10 km. Another example: in a government office, I was asked to go next door up the street. Next door was a block of flats, all privately owned. So I wander up the street. Eventually I find it, 100 m up the street, across a side-road and on the other side of the street. Next door? One needs to be clairvoyant.
Secondly, they can't count. Third right can mean anything from first right to 22nd right. I was directed once to third left along Makarios Avenue going North, after the Hilton. In fact, an hour later, I found it was in the street with the Irish pub on the corner, just before the Woolworth's lights.
Thirdly, they don't know their left from their right. On another occasion, I was told it was on the left. I double-checked with αριστερά but, of course, it was on the right (the other left?)
Fourthly, they cannot read maps. I have sent maps how to find our house on hundreds of occasions. If the recipient is Cypriot, two or three hours after the appointed time I get a phone call saying that he cannot find us and he is by the cemetery (or wherever), less than 100 m from where we are, where does he find us? It is usually a pain trying to guide him to us by phone (he has to make all of TWO turnings!) and, more than thrice, I have had to go out to find him. Yet, every other nationality, with the same map, has found us without the slightest difficulty.
There are very few decent maps with references to street names, except for Nicosia. Even then, if you're told that such-and-such a place is in John Kennedy Avenue, it may not occur to you to look under Tzon Kenenti in the list, so that would be useless.
Anyway, GPS mapping will be useless for Cypriots, even the expensive oral types that tell you to exit the motorway at the next junction and turn right, go 850 m and turn left and it is the third house on the left. They will have ended up in Kyrenia! As for the display type, it's oooh, it's a pretty picture!