Schnauzer wrote:The well known T.V. chef Antony Worrall Thompson (of "Ready Steady Cook") has recently been arrested at a 'Tesco' store where he was observed stealing cheese and wine, he has admitted the offence and has been given a 'Police Caution' as a result of his actions (apparently his conduct was proven to be 'Habitual').
Since he is 60 years of age, his conduct was reported to those who maintain a certain 'Vigilance' at 'Tesco' and other supermarkets on behalf of S.C.R.O.T.U.M.S. (which 'Brotherhood' usually offers assistance in cases where the 'Elderly' may fall foul of the 'Law' due to hardship).
However, since Antony is such a 'High Profile' personage, it would appear that a certain amount of leniency will be afforded him and his excuse is that he 'Temporarily Lapsed' and is suffering from 'Kleptomania'.
WELL, he certainly 'Stole the Show' this time, if he had kept his mouth shut upon his arrest, 'Jimmy' would have instructed 'The Brotherhood' to take up his case and no more would have been heard about it, as it IS, the press will have a field day in vilifying the silly old chap.
As 'Jimmy' said, "The Geezer shood'a took tha' bleed'en cheese more 'Caerphilly', soppy sod!"
Further information has just come out relative to the above scenario and it would appear that the sh*t has hit the 'Pan' subsequent to the 'Grilling' Antony received at the 'Tesco' store.
Now, Antony actually has an arrangement with 'Tesco' and his 'Cookware' is available throughout their stores, it would appear (from news received) that Antony was distressed to learn that his products were being sold off cheaply (1/2 price in fact) whilst HE was paid a 'Pitta'nce'.
Tesco was making 'Pots' of money and Antony had to 'Fork' out large sums to keep the shelves 'Stock'ed, which made him feel that all his hard 'Wok' was not worth the effort.
A totally different 'Kettle' of 'Fish' to the story we have been informed of so far, Antony was even insulted by one of the 'Tesco' staff when he was told that he was only small 'Fry' compared to other business associates, that if he had a 'Beef' with management he should 'Rack' his brains and come up with some scheme which would make him more 'Dough' if he wasn't satisfied.
By taking the cheese and wine, he was merely rubbing 'Salt' into the wounds that he may feel have been inflicted upon him by the 'Knife' of those who are in charge of 'Tesco's' financial deals, by acting in the way he HAS, (if he felt he was in trouble) he has merely jumped out of the 'Frying Pan' into the 'Fire'.
Antony will have to 'Cook' up a good excuse for his actions, if 'Tesco' prosecute him, he is sure to receive a 'Roasting' in the courts of law BUT, it is very unlikely that he will be doing any 'Porridge' at the end of it all.
As 'Jimmy would say "No matta wot the geezer sez, wen it all 'boils' darn, 'es a bleed'en 'Tea Leaf' !" 
