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[SKI-preo]

A Pom at Australian Customs

A Pom, fresh off the plane at Sydney airport, is trying to negotiate Australian customs. Finally, when it's his turn to get his passport stamped, the customs officer starts rattling off the usual questions:

C.O. - How long do you intend to stay?
POM - 1 week.

C.O. - What is the nature of this trip?
POM - Business.

C.O. - Do you have any past criminal convictions?
POM - I didn't think we still needed to!

[SKI-preo]

A Pom goes to Oz for a holiday and visits a huge sheep farm. He goes out with the guide and they come across a sheep with it's head stuck in a fence. The Ozzie guide quickly downs his trousers and undies and gives the sheep a good seeing to. He turns to the Pom and says "Now it's your turn mate". The Pom's a bit shocked at this but thinks "Oh well, I'm here on 'oliday init". So he downs his trousers ...and sticks his head in the fence!