gabaston wrote:heard this one yesterday-
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket, where she selected: A carton of semi-skimmed milk, Half a dozen eggs, A carton of orange juice, A head of romaine lettuce, A 2lb.tin of coffee, And a 1 lb. packet of bacon.
As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a bloke standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the bloke calmly stated, "You must be single."
The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single.
She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the man to her marital status.
Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct, but how on earth did you know that?"
The man replied, "Cause you're ugly."
cannedmoose wrote:Two blondes were taking their first train trip to the city. A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they'd never seen before. Each bought one.The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, she looked across to her friend and said, "I wouldn't eat that if I were you."
"Why not?"
"I took one bite and went blind for half a minute."
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