Cyprus-Forum.com

[paliometoxo]

not every woman in cyprus is like that or can afford to be like that...

[Sega]

Please enlighten me somebody. Thanks!!

I will do the honors. I completely agree with your statements, and have been saying this for sometime now. However, not all people are the same. I would personally like to thank you for putting such a thread on Cyprus Forum, as I truly see this as a major problem and since you put it so politely I will try my best to give you the best insights.

- Have cleaners for their houses even though they do not work

Traditionally Cypriot women were socially seen as lower than a man. Since women have started to earn an income via full time employment, many have decided to oversee their prior duties by hiring cleaners and servants. Most Cypriot women who have cleaners do work, the ones who do not work and have time for cleaners are likely to be in some sort of affair or pre-affair stage.

- Their mothers raise their children

They do this to be able to work and earn more money. The mother goes to work, so the grandmother can take care of the children.

- They do not cook (mum does that as well, minimum twice a day)

Some cook, however, particularly with the younger wives they certainly don't at first. I feel this is not entirely the wives fault. I think this is probably their mother who are to blame as they refuse to let go, and feel the only way they can be in their child's life is by cooking. Cypriot parents find it hard to let go. Like I previously said, not all people are the same, and this is not the same for all young wives.

- Go on regular holidays because they are always tired

I don't think they are tired, I feel it has more to do with their mentality. Have you ever heard the word "cle-ede", it means to cry. Women and men a-like in Cyprus like to cry about things, overly moan on how bad they have it. You probably already know that people can get jealous, and this is a way to combat that jealousy, by making out that they are a victim or worse off than you actually are. It's kind of clever if you think about it.

- Visit the hairdresser twice weekly

They do this so they can sleep with their hair dresser, .... only joking.

Appearance are as good as the soul they are holding. Anyhow, Cyprus has recently become a very materialistic country, and many have lost sight of what is truly important. Many women feel their worth is their appearance, and put this down to their soul purpose. It has a lot to do with validating them-self, ensuring they are still desirable, as well as improving their first impressions. I would like to ask you a question, "If you were the only person in the world, would you care about your appearance?" The answer is no.

- Visit a beautician twice weekly

See above.

(this one is a clssic) order fried chips from the takeaway store for the kids if they do not like grandma's cooking and she happens to not be home to cook something else.

I think it has to do with laziness, as well as their husband tolerating this kind of behavior. If one can get away with not doing something, they often will not do it.

- Have to drive a luxury car. The husband gets the shitty beat up twin cabin

Again, with wanting to be desirable, feeling special or superior to everybody else. It's silly, nobody needs a luxury car, a materialistic asset that lowers the value of your soul.

- Act like bitches all day and think they are the center of the universe.

This has again to do with men tolerating that kind of behavior. You need to remember than people who make out to be the be-all and end-all of the universe, do so because they were spoiled, or mistreated and decided to take a stand.

Taking from your thread that you are a man. I would like to give you some good advice, one which I hope will stick to you through your life. Not everybody is the same, we all get what we deserve, and people hardly (if ever) change.

Having said this, if I was to meet a woman who was spoiled, up her self and spoke down to me, I would simply ignore her and move along. If I was to meet a woman who displayed symptoms of laziness, I would move along. I do not have time to waste with immature women.

Is that why alot of men have affairs here?

On the contrary, women are bad because men are bad first. Cypriot men have affairs to ensure they are men, alpha-male, or how can I put it, not a push-tea (gay person). Again, a man is not defined by the women he slept with, but by his achievements and ability to stand up when things get tough.

Don't feel sorry for younger men, as I said, we all get what we deserve. In a country were it is socially acceptable for men go with prostitutes and have sex to ensure they penis is still masculine, you can't really expect better.

Having said this, not all men are the same, and similar to women. I believe there are good young wives about, and also good young husbands waiting to get paired up.

I would also like to add, that I can afford to do anything I desired, but I don't because of my upbringing. I do not feel people who are like this do this because of the money they have, but simply because they either can do it, or they are uneducated and feel this is the way to progress.

I hope this has given you a clear understanding of the problem, all problems have a solution. So all those problems you stated to have a solution.

Thanks again for putting such a meaningful thread up, and I hope you found my reply useful.

[Filitsa]

Hmmm ... interesting. I must admit I was a bit taken aback to hear my cousin complain about how stressful her life is. She works a twenty hour week; I work a 40 hour week. Her husband, 25 hours a week on the average; mine, an easy 50. Her cleaning lady-nanny arrives at 8:00 A.M, makes breakfast, cleans, and watches the children. She leaves for work at 8:30 and returns at 1:30 fatigued from a desk job that would be in her home if it were any closer. She then naps and awakens to a ready made lunch. The cleaning lady-nanny cleans up after lunch and departs 'til tomorrow. I have a cleaning lady. She comes once every two weeks. No nanny. When I'm at work, my kids are at school. I take them there in the morning, and pick them up in the afternoon. When they were preschoolers, I was home with them. I'm no hero, and I wouldn't have it any other way. She lives in Cyprus; I live in America. I say, if she can have this lifestyle, then all the more power to her, but complain? Give me a break!

[SSBubbles]

Takes all sorts!

Mmmmmm, liquorice!

[JoJo]

Hi Sega. Thank you for your response. Precise and to the point. Your parents have done a fantastic job raising you in to the true gentelman that you are. God bless and may many great things come into your life. You have given me hope that there are other normal people out there.

I am female by the way..

[Twilight]

Hi all ..interesting subject , good insight Sega .. On my travels it appears to be the same world wide now ..The arrogance illness .. Is money the root of evil then ? My children are all grown ... the elder 2 do have a live in maid as they can afford it .. the younger one cannot , she is the Mother and Father to 3 sturdy boys and a darn good job she does .. And sadly to say the elder ones have a certain arrogance about them ... Yet all had the same upbringing ... There are a lot of normal people around the globe ..but the arrogant ones talk the loudest ...

[paliometoxo]

so sega u mention the part about the women not working and having a back girl to come do everything that they are most likely cheating.. what give u that impression?? that they are cheating?. what makes u so sure????

[Sega]

so sega u mention the part about the women not working and having a back girl to come do everything that they are most likely cheating.. what give u that impression?? that they are cheating?. what makes u so sure????

It all depends on the factor of her laziness.

If somebody does not work and has no time to clean, it means her time is spent elsewhere, and much of it, enough to keep her mind busy. So where is this time spent? I can only presume it is spent away from her husband, maybe doing her nails, hair, make-up, buying clothes, being a real ms. madam, one thing often leads to another. Men will no doubt in shops etc.. take an interest in her, and obviously things connect, and one thing leads to another.

A once bored lazy housewife, who found liberation from her duties now finds excitement in her life, and what better excitement than an affair, something to detach herself from her duties, and from reality to a man who she feels has more in common than her husband.

I know many people who have oppairs, and cheat on their husbands. Often the husband knows but his too scared to say anything. Oppairs are a bad idea, they cause destructions in families.

Not all people are like this. If somebody has a cleaner, it does not mean she is cheating. Having said this, it could be that she spends all her time cooking, in which case is a good thing. But there is no real reason for a young healthy woman to have an oppair, working or otherwise.

I welcome any more comments.

Is money the root of evil then ?

The love of money is the root of all evil, but only if that loves outweighs your moral ethics.

the elder 2 do have a live in maid as they can afford it

This is no reason to have a live in maid. We don't have a maid, we can afford it, but who wants a stranger.

And sadly to say the elder ones have a certain arrogance about them ... Yet all had the same upbringing ... There are a lot of normal people around the globe ..but the arrogant ones talk the loudest ...

It all depends on the person, some people don't change character and other's change, depending on their financial status. I will always be the same wacky person, with or without money. I must say that you attract a lot of jealousy and envy when your do have more money than normal people. People in Cyprus especially, either hate you or kiss your bum when you got money. This influx in people's treatment can cause problems.

I would like to ask you a question, "If you had all the money in the world, but was alone as a person, would you be arrogant about it" Nope. Arrogance comes from the people you mix and the treatment of those people to yourself.

But since I do not publish were I live, or the financial status of my family, people treat me the same. Why would somebody go round to people and say his dad is a millionaire? What good can arise from that?

I was raised in a privileged household, which means I am used to money, so for me it's normal I do not talk down to people as I realise that money comes and goes, but your soul is for life.

I hope this helps you understand.

[cymart]

To be honest,I find Cypriot society to be very hypocritical and false about many aspects of life-don't do as I do, but do as I say you should do etc!I have visited many countries with different cultures and found some Pacific islanders and also the Finns to be very liberal about things like affairs and sex etc.They do not have jealousy as a predominant phenomena in their way of living and people seem to to treat each other as equals and are open about saying what they think and believe.As one islander told me,until the arrival of western explorers and ships a couple of centuries ago when sailors began to spread venereal diseases to their local women who regarded sex as a very pleasurable and natural part of every day life,their society had none of the problems which are predominant in many places today...
Coming back to Cyprus and its modern history and having known the island before 1974,there are many aspects of Greek-Cypriot behaviour which still puzzle me after living over 30 years here and sometimes make me very angry and offended:for example,me and my wife came here for 10 days in September 1975,the year after the war,mainly to visit close friends and relatives from Famagusta and the Karpas.(my wifes grandparents were still enclaved up there then and despite me being British,my persistent efforts to go and see them failed)The island was still in 'shock' following the events of the previous year and people were still living in tents near various towns,including my wifes uncle and his family,although even then I also began to notice a rather worrying indifference among many other people who were from places on this side such as Limassol etc who carried on as if everything in Cyprus was normal...(my wifes uncle also told us of some unpleasant things which many refugees had experienced from people in Larnaca,who he said had tried to exploit them by selling them the basic necessities they needed,although I didn't take much notice at the time!).When I next came for a holiday in 1978,this time with my wife and her mother,the attitude of many people here was even more blatantly indifferent and some in Limassol even told us that they didn't want the situation in Cyprus to change as things were 'quiet, tourism was recovering etc. and life was o.k. for them.We even heard some of them laughing about how much some of the rich people in Famagusta and Kyrenia had lost and that it was now their turn to enjoy the high-life!!When we told them we were from Famagusta, and not very rich, but just wanted to return home,there was an embarassed silence and they would try to make excuses that they were 'just joking' etc!!I would be interested to read peoples comments on what I have written so far...(more to follow later)

[Twilight]

Yes Sega I am understanding those issues ...as to live in maids , well it amuse's me , as when my children were young , the fun of life was to juggle a home life as well as being self employed. But know children come and the live in maid is so useful to help with the children ... but oh how much fun is missed , with every life's ups n downs ...