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[chrisp]

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband to 'Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin'.

'What?' said the puzzled groom.

'How can that be possible if you've been married ten times.?'

'Well, husband#1 was a Sales Representative; he just kept telling me how great it was going to be.
'Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me..
'Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
'Husband #5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.
'Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
'Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
'Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
'Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it. .
'Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was ...
God I miss him.
'But now that I've married you, I'm so excited'.
'Wonderful', said the husband, 'but why?
To which she replied,
'You're with the 'GOVERNMENT' . ..
This time I KNOW I'M gonna get SCREWED.