Cyprus-Forum.com

by **CBBB** » Sun Jan 11, 2009 8:02 pm

Again I apologise before you read this, especially to anyone called Sharon or Tracey.

Will and Guy have created this guide for those of you who will venture into the English county known as Essex, where they have a language all of their own.

Essex is in the UK, not far from London, and the accent is not unlike cockney, but without the rhyming slang.

We recommend that you speak each phrase or word out loud before reading the translation which we have supplied:alma chizzit - A request to find the cost of an item: how much is it?

amant - Quantity; sum total ('Thez a yuge amant of mud in Saffend'): amount

assband - Unable to leave the house because of illness or disability: housebound

awss - A four legged animal, on which money is won, or more likely lost ('That awss ya tipped cost me a fiver t'day'): horse

branna - More brown than on a previous occasion ('Ere, Trace, ya look branna today, ‘ave you been on sunbed?'): browner

cort a panda - A rather large hamburger: quarter pounder

Dan in the maff - Unhappy ('Wossmatta, Trace, ya look a bit Dan in the maff'): down in the mouth

eye-eels - Women's shoes: heels

Furrock - The location of Lakeside Shopping Centre: Thurrock

garrij - A building where a car is kept or repaired(Trace: 'Oi, Darren, I fink the motah needs at go in the garrij cos it aint working proper'): garage

Ibeefa - Balaeric holiday island: Ibiza

lafarjik - Lacking in energy ('I feel all lafarjik'): lethargic

OI OI! - Traditional greeting. Often heard from the doorway of pubs or during banging dance tunes at clubs: hello

paipa - The Sun, The Mirror or The Sport: newspaper

reband - The period of recovery and emotional turmoil after rejection by a lover ('I couldn't elp it, I wuz on the reband from Craig'): rebound

Saffend - Essex coastal resort boasting the longest pleasure pier in the world. The place where the characters from TV's, popular soap opera, Eastenders go on holiday: Southend

tan - The city of London, the big smoke: town

webbats - Querying the location something or someone is. ('Webbats is me dole card Trace? I've gotta sign on in arf hour'): whereabouts

wonnid - Desired, needed or Wanted by the police: wanted

zaggerate - To suggest that something is bigger or better than it actually is. ('I told ya a fazzand times already'): exaggerate