Maynard23 wrote:I have received information from my man in St James's (Jimmy Light) who informs me of the following snippets which I will interpret on his behalf.
It would appear that a male form was observed within the confines of a tent in the early hours of this morning lighting up a tilley lamp.
Probably completely oblivious to the fact that the silhouette would be considerably emphasized by the light in such a confined space, the gentleman (or so it is assumed), proceeded to lower his pyjama bottoms and actually adopted a crouched position in order to defecate into a bucket !!.
Jimmy informs me that, at this point, he (Jimmy) coughed rather loudly and observed the silhouette regaining an upright posture rather speedily.
Unfortunately, the tilley lamp was positioned immediately above the silhouette and the resulting CLANG !! was followed by a torrent of expletives far to gross for revelation on this forum.
Jimmy says that he is sure he heard some foreign sounding name being called out but was unable to determine exactly which name it was, the lamp was snuffed out at this point and Jimmy withdrew.
Jimmy was very reluctant to report this incident but felt it was his duty to do so for a very noble reason, he feels that the occupant of the tent should be made aware of the dangers such exposure in such a location could give rise to, he quite rightly points out that many of our M.Ps. and Legal Reps etc, are particularly fond of practising their "Cottageing" techniques in that vicinity (and in the small hours) and fears that the unfortunate occupant may suffer molestation.
Perhaps one of the occupant's entourage might like to pass on this information if they have any idea as to whom he/she may be (Jimmy suspects a he) and obviously warn of the dangers and consequences of such behaviour.
I do believe that the habit of defecating in a bucket, originated among the itinerant folk, I have no problem with them myself God Bless them, I do believe they are a little troublesome up around the Surrey areas of the U.K. at this time of the year but cannot be sure.
Perhaps someone with closer contact may be able to enlighten us all, hopefully Jimmy will be able to give us an update later. IMHO.
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