CHINESE FORTUNE COOKIES:
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Virginity like bubble,
one prick, all gone.
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Man who run in front of car
get tired.
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Man who run behind car
get exhausted.
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Man with hand in pocket
feel cocky all day.
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Foolish man give wife grand piano,
wise man give wife upright organ.
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Man who walk through
airport turnstile sideways
going to Bangkok
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Man with one chopstick go hungry.
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Man who scratch ass
should not bite fingernails.
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Man who eat many prunes
get good run for money.
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Baseball is wrong:
Man with four balls cannot walk.
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Panties not best thing on earth!
But next to best thing on earth.
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War does not determine who is right,
war determine who is left.
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Wife who put husband in doghouse
soon find him in cathouse.
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Man who fight with wife all day
get no piece at night.
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It take many nails to build crib,
but one screw to fill it.
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Man who drive like hell,
bound to get there.
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Man who stand on toilet
is high on pot.
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Man who live in glass house should
change clothes in basement.
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Man who fish in other man's well,
often catch crabs.
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Man who fart in church
sit in own pew.
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Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
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