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Two Aussies

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Two Aussies

Postby webbo » Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:20 pm

Two Aussies are adrift in a lifeboat. While rummaging through the boat's provisions one of them finds an old lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie suddenly appears. This genie tells them that he only grants one wish.

Without giving much thought to the matter, the lamp finder blurts out, "Turn the entire ocean into VB!"

The genie claps his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turns into beer.

The genie disappears and only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull breaks the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances.

The second Aussie turns to the first and says, "Nice going mate! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat."
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Postby Cheshire Cat » Tue Feb 05, 2008 5:31 pm

Nice one !!

A woman was entertaining her lover one afternoon in the bedroom,
Just as things start to get interesting , the front door opens and the heavy footsteps of her husband are heard coming up the stairs,
Quick she says to her lover hide in the wardrobe,

Hubby comes in and sees his lovely wife in bed naked, "what are you doing in bed in the middle of the day he says"
"Well darling I had a feeling you would be home early and I thought you may like a bit of fun she replied"

Hubby strips and goes to hang up his clothes in the wardrobe, he sees tha naked man there.

What the hell are you doing in there he says.

Well says the lover, there is an infestation of moths in the area.

Oh , says the husband, then why are you naked,

Naked, Naked!! the lover looks down and says

The Little Buggers !!!!
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Postby Yeah Whatever! » Sun Feb 10, 2008 9:23 pm

Q. What do you call a man with an IQ of 50??

A. GIFTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HA HA!!!
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Postby Yeah Whatever! » Sun Feb 10, 2008 9:25 pm

Q. What's the different between a man and ET??

A. ET phoned home..

LOL!!!
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Postby raiseurfist » Sun Feb 10, 2008 9:28 pm

Yeah Whatever! wrote:Q. What do you call a man with an IQ of 50??

A. GIFTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HA HA!!!

Yeah Whatever! wrote:Q. What's the different between a man and ET??

A. ET phoned home..

LOL!!!


ehhhh boring
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Postby Cheshire Cat » Sun Feb 10, 2008 11:12 pm

It was Isaac and Rebecca's Golden wedding anniversary, Rebecca turns to Isaac and says, Have a look out of the window darling and see what I bought you.
There outside was a gleaming Rolls Royce , Isaac Gasped, Beccy, Beccy my love he cried, could you possibly afford such a thing.
Isaac, do you know for 50 years every time we made love I charged you 50cents, well I saved it up over the years and there it is a Rolls Royce , just for you.

Oh BECCY , my sweet why didn't you tell me,
I would have given you all my Business !!!!!
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