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two duck hunters

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two duck hunters

Postby chrisp » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:21 pm

ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE
INCIDENT.

A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly payments of $560.00).

He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It's mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.
Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.
So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action: they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG....???
Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING; especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming.
One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black Lab.The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on. Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course
terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !

The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened" looks on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments. The dog is okay. . .doing fine.
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Re: two duck hunters

Postby cyprusgrump » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:26 pm

chrisp wrote:ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE
INCIDENT.

A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly payments of $560.00).

He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It's mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.
Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.
So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action: they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.
Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG....???
Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING; especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming.
One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black Lab.The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on. Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course
terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !

The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened" looks on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments. The dog is okay. . .doing fine.

Just an urban legend... :roll:

http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp
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Postby Jerry » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:30 pm

Brilliant. Divine retribution on the duck death squad. If they had had a "highly trained" Lab like mine was they would have been OK - he would have eaten the dynamite before it exploded :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby cyprusgrump » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:45 pm

Jerry wrote:Brilliant. Divine retribution on the duck death squad. If they had had a "highly trained" Lab like mine was they would have been OK - he would have eaten the dynamite before it exploded :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ahem...

Just an urban legend...

http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp
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Postby chrisp » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:48 pm

sry guys only just had it emailed to me didnt realise it wasnt true
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Postby Jerry » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:51 pm

cyprusgrump wrote:
Jerry wrote:Brilliant. Divine retribution on the duck death squad. If they had had a "highly trained" Lab like mine was they would have been OK - he would have eaten the dynamite before it exploded :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ahem...

Just an urban legend...

http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp


Surely a RURAL legend. It's a good story anyway. Stop being so grumpy, don't you know it's nearly Christmas :D :D :D
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Postby cyprusgrump » Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:54 pm

Jerry wrote:
cyprusgrump wrote:
Jerry wrote:Brilliant. Divine retribution on the duck death squad. If they had had a "highly trained" Lab like mine was they would have been OK - he would have eaten the dynamite before it exploded :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ahem...

Just an urban legend...

http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp


Surely a RURAL legend. It's a good story anyway. Stop being so grumpy, don't you know it's nearly Christmas :D :D :D

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Postby Bill » Fri Dec 07, 2007 4:45 pm

Is it raining in Cyprus grumps :lol:
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Postby Nikitas » Fri Dec 07, 2007 5:15 pm

Obviously they were not Cypriots! Every Cypriot boy knows that the way to attract ducks is to lay a shiny piece of material on the ground (space blanket, aluminum foil) and ducks dive on it. Typical high tech overkill!

By the way- the trick is not Cypriot but Italian poaching technique. So dont jump on my head.
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Postby cyprusgrump » Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:08 pm

Bill wrote:Is it raining in Cyprus grumps :lol:

Always...
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