Sega wrote:Depends on why she is upset. Say if I was having an affair she would have every right to confront me, however if she was upset because I drive a VW instead of an Audi, she would have little room to talk.
As a result of their upbringing some women are more demanding than others. They have this void inside them that can never be filled and subsequently they would make up excuses to why they are annoyed, which have little bearing on the truth.
All men are different; your question also is greatly dependant on what type of a man he is. This different depends on his upbringing and environment.
This example is not set in-stone and does not reflect 100% on the truth; it is just to illustrate what I mean. Let’s say my farther is the dominant character of the family and I have just got married to my wife which I love. Her mother is the dominant of the family. Because of the environment she believes she has the right to be dominant and subsequently I believe I have the right. Many factors are given to dominant roles not just whether your mother/farther was dominant in the household. Anyway because both people feel they are the leaders and subsequently egotistical, not one single person gives the other person a right to tell them anything.
Like we illustrated before, all men are different, and some are more akward than others when it comes to certain things (No go areas). A typical no go area for me is when dealing with business and financial matters (I am not saying I am right, but this is what I am awkward in and this awkwardness has derived from my upbringing and generally the way I am, which to be honest I cannot change).
There is also a lot of weight on how the woman tells the man the problem. Not all men are fair, some men whatever the reason will reject being spoken down to by a woman, and others will not mind. Some men require a dominant approach and others might require a soft touch.
As you have said, this has happened twice this month, which means you have been upset more than once. People do not really change and if they do it takes years and the changes are minimal, they tend to stay the same. However sometimes in the beginning of any relationship you need to confront these differences. If this friendship continues two things are likely to happen. The first thing is that you will be forced to accept him and be de-censored to his manners which previously upset you. The second thing is that he will change and take into stride the way you want him to be. Every action however has a consequence and every dictator has his/her day, so getting your way now might mean in the future there will be a power shift and it might not be in your favour. Sometimes spouses change roles and inherit each others characteristics.
Some men or women are unfair until you are unfair to them. On the end of the day it only takes one person to be reasonable to solve most problems in the partnership. Even if the resolve to that problem is to leave the other person.
The best advice I can give you is go for a person who does not upset you. Obviously all men are different and have their way, but go for one who’s ways don't upset you, a man who you feel has more good than bad. A man that makes you happy.
There are many men out there that fit this profile, however sometimes those men don't shine as much as the others.
I hope this has helped you understand and I wish you can find happiness in the person you are with.
Dear Sega,
this was not about what car they drive. I dont care if its a TOYOTA or a MBW since is doing what it was made to do is fine by me.
This was not about who is going to be the demand stuff that are not possible or dominant. It was a simple thing and between friends.
By the way, i used upset because it was one of this things that need few mins and it will pass, not something that you are angry and you share hart feeling for the rest of your life etc.
And I dont have a boyfriend and I am not interested in any of this guys. They are just my friends.
As for the bit with the unfair... I will write what happened with one of them and you will tell me if i was unfair.
He is a friend who is moving in a house in the town I live. I told him that since he is single and a block (and quite useless with cleaning), I will help him to clean the house. So that day he come and pick me from my house and while he is driving he mention that he did not had lunch and I said "so am I, so we will get something together". On the way to the house we stopped few times because we needed some stuff but on the last stop i stayed in the car talking on the phone, so i did not know what he bought. When we arrived at his house I start immediately the cleaning and he set up his internet. While I am scratching the bath, toilet and sink...i needed some cleaning stuff and i go to the kitchen and see him eating his sandwich with crisps and drinking his tea. So i ask him if he got anything for me and he said no i didnt think that you wanted. I mention him that i did mention it in the car that I did not had lunch either but anyway i try to stay calm. By the way he knew i was ill this days but not even ask me if i wanted a tea. I ask him to change the sit of the toilet when he finish so I can finish that room and i went upstairs for further cleaning. When i went downstairs after a while to finish what i left in the middle i saw him messing with the internet...so me being hungry, ill, tired and pissed off i kind of explode since he did not even done that simple thing I ask. After explaining the whole situation he sayed sorry and ask me..."What do you want me to do first the toilet sit or go and get some food?" That irritated me a bit but i said do something and dont just look at me...and he asks again..."Should I do it now"
Anyway I was laughing after few min but that moment I just wanted to bang my head on the wall.
By the way, this friend is very good friend and he worries about me all the time, helps me when i need help etc. It was just one of those moments that his brain did not help him enough
Kidding
So Sega, I was unfair that I was upset or I am just another crazy lady who do not need a reason to be upset?
