Cyprus-Forum.com

[Pyrpolizer]

Joderv1,

So the REAL reason you are leaving are the problems you have with your husband's family, I mean the fact they never accepted you?
And why the hell do you have to associate so much with them you are grown ups with your own family for goodness sake!

I am interested to learn what the OTHER reasons are. Economic? Insecurity? What...

And could you please write those reasons down in a priority manner?

[joderv1]

Joderv1,

So the REAL reason you are leaving are the problems you have with your husband's family, I mean the fact they never accepted you?
And why the hell do you have to associate so much with them you are grown ups with your own family for goodness sake!

I am interested to learn what the OTHER reasons are. Economic? Insecurity? What...

And could you please write those reasons down in a priority manner?

Hi Pyrpolizer,

I did make some comments about other reasons for leaving on other posts on this thread. I know it has turned into a long one.

Jo

[Kikapu]

They cannot accept the fact I am NOT Turkish Cypriot. They had a problem with me at the start and my husband chose me. We moved here under the illusion that after 13 years (11 years at the time) that they would have got over that.

It has been made clear to me in both words and actions I am 'NOT part of the family'.


Jo

Joderv1,

You have to understand something. You're dealing with people who has a 15th Century mentality, so no matter what you do, you cannot change that. Thank goodness, your husband moved into the 21st Century long ago. If you give his family another 100 years, then guess what.....yes, they will eventually get into the 16th century.

I believe, your husband thought, after many years being married to you, and have children, his family will be more welcoming to you and your kids. They are probably as cruel to your husband, as they were to you. We are taught to obey our elders from childhood, and not stand against them, our elders, and in return, they have continually abused this privilege. I expect things to get worse in the "TRNC", as more 15th century minded Anatolian flood the place, and view foreign girls and women nothing more than "whores".

I urge you to move away, as far as you can, so that your children are spared from all that. These people are like a "cancer", that will eat you up, and then spit you out.

I wish you and your brave husband and children, all the very best, by walking (running) away from his families stranglehold. I can assure you, you will do much better, where ever you end up, as long as you're away from these despicable people.

[Viewpoint]

They cannot accept the fact I am NOT Turkish Cypriot. They had a problem with me at the start and my husband chose me. We moved here under the illusion that after 13 years (11 years at the time) that they would have got over that.

It has been made clear to me in both words and actions I am 'NOT part of the family'.


Jo

Joderv1,

You have to understand something. You're dealing with people who has a 15th Century mentality, so no matter what you do, you cannot change that. Thank goodness, your husband moved into the 21st Century long ago. If you give his family another 100 years, then guess what.....yes, they will eventually get into the 16th century.

I believe, your husband thought, after many years being married to you, and have children, his family will be more welcoming to you and your kids. They are probably as cruel to your husband, as they were to you. We are taught to obey our elders from childhood, and not stand against them, our elders, and in return, they have continually abused this privilege. I expect things to get worse in the "TRNC", as more 15th century minded Anatolian flood the place, and view foreign girls and women nothing more than "whores".

I urge you to move away, as far as you can, so that your children are spared from all that. These people are like a "cancer", that will eat you up, and then spit you out.

I wish you and your brave husband and children, all the very best, by walking (running) away from his families stranglehold. I can assure you, you will do much better, where ever you end up, as long as you're away from these despicable people.

You sound very bitter and twisted, do you have some personal experience of being rejected by your TC family maybe that's the reason you have not been back to Cyprus for over 40 years and hate us so much seizing every opportunity with zest to criticize TCs.

[joderv1]

They cannot accept the fact I am NOT Turkish Cypriot. They had a problem with me at the start and my husband chose me. We moved here under the illusion that after 13 years (11 years at the time) that they would have got over that.

It has been made clear to me in both words and actions I am 'NOT part of the family'.


Jo

Joderv1,

You have to understand something. You're dealing with people who has a 15th Century mentality, so no matter what you do, you cannot change that. Thank goodness, your husband moved into the 21st Century long ago. If you give his family another 100 years, then guess what.....yes, they will eventually get into the 16th century.

I believe, your husband thought, after many years being married to you, and have children, his family will be more welcoming to you and your kids. They are probably as cruel to your husband, as they were to you. We are taught to obey our elders from childhood, and not stand against them, our elders, and in return, they have continually abused this privilege. I expect things to get worse in the "TRNC", as more 15th century minded Anatolian flood the place, and view foreign girls and women nothing more than "whores".

I urge you to move away, as far as you can, so that your children are spared from all that. These people are like a "cancer", that will eat you up, and then spit you out.

I wish you and your brave husband and children, all the very best, by walking (running) away from his families stranglehold. I can assure you, you will do much better, where ever you end up, as long as you're away from these despicable people.

Thank you for your comments Kikapu. Not all families are like this, but I have been unlucky and as they say you cannot chose your in-laws.

My husband left Cyprus when he was 18 and moved to the UK. He is more open-minded and he admits that if he stayed in Cyprus he would not have this privilege. In the UK you meet other cultures and people and you realise there is more out there.

I am a very strong woman and I stand up for myself. I will not let them belittle me for not being what they wanted for their son. Someone commented that we are grown ups and why we associate with them so much.

We don't really see them very much anymore, but Cyprus is a small Island and you hear things. We thought we had come to an agreement and resolved some issues, but again you hear more things about me.

Family is not the only reason we are leaving, but as per post title and article life is somewhat difficult here and not getting easier. Cost of living is rising and Cyprus is not place for us. We took a risk and we are going back to UK with heads held high. It has been an experience and my husband is now aware of his families full feelings and attitudes.

Good luck to others.

Jo

[Kikapu]

hate us so much seizing every opportunity with zest to criticize TCs.

Sorry VP, I did not realize that you were the family "joderv1" was talking about.

What are you saying, there's no truth in what I'm saying. Hell, I have one or two 15th Century mental cases in my family too.

Of course VP, you and all the TC's and Anatolian that you know, are just perfect....don't make me laugh.

[Viewpoint]

hate us so much seizing every opportunity with zest to criticize TCs.

Sorry VP, I did not realize that you were the family "joderv1" was talking about.

What are you saying, there's no truth in what I'm saying. Hell, I have one or two 15th Century mental cases in my family too.

Of course VP, you and all the TC's and Anatolian that you know, are just perfect....don't make me laugh.

There are these types of attitudes all over the world, you trying very hard to attribute anything negative purely to TCs, that tells me you have something against them or you are not a TC.

[Kikapu]

hate us so much seizing every opportunity with zest to criticize TCs.

Sorry VP, I did not realize that you were the family "joderv1" was talking about.

What are you saying, there's no truth in what I'm saying. Hell, I have one or two 15th Century mental cases in my family too.

Of course VP, you and all the TC's and Anatolian that you know, are just perfect....don't make me laugh.

There are these types of attitudes all over the world, you trying very hard to attribute anything negative purely to TCs, that tells me you have something against them or you are not a TC.

VP, why don't you go and drink your milk now, because you are not showing any maturity in accepting the truth.

"Joderv1" is not married to "all over the world families", she is married to a TC, a wonderful man it appears, but his family are the ones, that are in the 15th century time warp.

I don't know, what is it that you want to make an argument about, but if you want, go ahead You're just making my point, stronger with your denials.

[MR-from-NG]

They cannot accept the fact I am NOT Turkish Cypriot. They had a problem with me at the start and my husband chose me. We moved here under the illusion that after 13 years (11 years at the time) that they would have got over that.

It has been made clear to me in both words and actions I am 'NOT part of the family'.


Jo

Joderv1,

You have to understand something. You're dealing with people who has a 15th Century mentality, so no matter what you do, you cannot change that. Thank goodness, your husband moved into the 21st Century long ago. If you give his family another 100 years, then guess what.....yes, they will eventually get into the 16th century.

I believe, your husband thought, after many years being married to you, and have children, his family will be more welcoming to you and your kids. They are probably as cruel to your husband, as they were to you. We are taught to obey our elders from childhood, and not stand against them, our elders, and in return, they have continually abused this privilege. I expect things to get worse in the "TRNC", as more 15th century minded Anatolian flood the place, and view foreign girls and women nothing more than "whores".

I urge you to move away, as far as you can, so that your children are spared from all that. These people are like a "cancer", that will eat you up, and then spit you out.

I wish you and your brave husband and children, all the very best, by walking (running) away from his families stranglehold. I can assure you, you will do much better, where ever you end up, as long as you're away from these despicable people.

We've only heard Joderv's side of the story. For all we know she could be the daughter in law from hell. She could be a very unreasonable individual demanding and expecting too much from the in-laws as well as the TRNC. I have cousins that are/were married to English and Irish women some of the horror stories they can tell you would put you off women for ever. Sorry if I sound cynical but there are 2 sides to every story.

[Get Real!]

hate us so much seizing every opportunity with zest to criticize TCs.

Sorry VP, I did not realize that you were the family "joderv1" was talking about.

What are you saying, there's no truth in what I'm saying. Hell, I have one or two 15th Century mental cases in my family too.

Of course VP, you and all the TC's and Anatolian that you know, are just perfect....don't make me laugh.

There are these types of attitudes all over the world, you trying very hard to attribute anything negative purely to TCs, that tells me you have something against them or you are not a TC.

Leave our Bananiot alone!